Nonverbal vs Verbal Communication

PART I

The language experiment was quite interesting and somewhat fun to do. For the first fifteen minutes I engaged in a conversation with an individual but under a certain condition, I was not allowed to use any symbolic language (writing, ASL, no speaking). At first it was going quite smoothly just listening to the stories this person had to say about how their day went and some of the struggles they had encountered throughout the day. However, once five minutes started to kick in, the individual began to feel quite uncomfortable from me being unresponsive. It was very difficult to not say anything, especially because the individual questioned me a few times in order to get my opinion. I was unable to reply like I stated previously and I notice a facial expression change on the individual from passive to aggravation. The individual by the way is my very own sister. On a regular day when we are conversing, I tend to give her a lot of my opinions and speak of the things that went on in my day. She did not expect me to be silent for quite so long. By quite I mean not being verbal whatsoever. My hand gestures, facial expressions and body movements were making her feel uneasy. She started saying “you are so weird,” “How come you can’t give me a response to this and when you need one from me, I always give it to you,” and last but not least “are you even listening to me?” She was the one to be in control of the conversation the whole time which is somewhat weird because I am usually the one in control of it. She would be the listener any other day and for this experiment she had to lead and try to change topics to see if I was paying any attention to her at all, even though I tried showing her that I was with my body language.

I did not conduct this experiment with any further individuals or better yet, a group of people. But if I would have done so then I think it wouldn’t have been as awkward or difficult. Simply nodding or smiling to the person in response to their initiation of a conversation shows that someone is listening and absorbing every spec of detail he or she is speaking of. Plus there are other people in the group in which some tend to speak for the others and it just makes things a tad bit easier. I was unable to ask any questions. I somewhat answered the individual’s questions through my body language. At least that is what I think. As for power, the power would lean toward the individual (my sister). She was in control of it. Although there was some sort of power coming from my end by my expression in showing that I was in agreement of paying attention to her. Yet I believe verbal communication is more powerful than non-verbal language. Verbally you get to fully express yourself and non-verbally you only highlight specific points. I feel that way because I am accustomed to such way of communication. There are a few cultures where they use a different method of communication and it works well with their people. However, spoken language is far more common which makes it have an advantage over any other form of communication. It is being able to express one’s feelings, thoughts and practice reasoning in a world full of so many possibilities. Having a voice and using it gives us a vast amount of power already. If someone who is verbal tries to communicate with someone from a culture where non-verbal communication, they will find it very difficult and would also feel some sort of oppression from not being able to fully express themselves.

PART II

Now the second time around, I still find it a tad bit difficult communicating. Although for part 2 verbal communications was allowed minus the physical embellishments. It was tough for me because whenever I speak on any regular day, I tend to use my hands a lot to further explain what I am verbally saying. I again felt a bit constraint withholding myself from not speaking with my body language. I mean a conversation was flowing for awhile. Started off smoothly when introducing ourselves and asking about each other’s day. Then that is where I started noticing a bit of difficulty and the start of loss of interest in the conversation. My sister said that she started to find me boring and very dull when communicating in such manner. She in fact ended the conversation after like eight minutes and walked away. She didn’t want to continue speaking with me when I was speaking in such manner. This showed to me that using physical embellishments when speaking to anyone is vital. Body language help get across the true feelings of the person to the other person. A type of aura is set when one uses those abilities when communicating which helps identify whether a person carries a good or bad vibe with them. As technology keeps progressing rapidly, many have had trouble when text messaging people. Some have said that misinterpretation is common and true feelings never get across though it is a rapid way of communicating with another. Real time communication would remain important simply because of the true emotions; ideas and aura of a person are felt way more than technology was of speaking.

Body language in other words is a code of nonverbal cues. We spent most of our time trying to decode people’s body language and vice versa. The body participates in showing or even hiding one’s mental state. Learning how to read body language helps us really read what people are feeling aside from what they have verbally have said they have felt. Some say they are feeling fine when in reality deep down inside they are hurting. Reading body language help us discern when people are telling the truth or when they are lying. It also lets the speaker know that the listener is attentive to detail of their communication. I am sure many can read body language it is just that some are quite ignorant of it and choose not to pay attention to someone’s nonverbal communication. There are a few situations where reading someone’s body language is not beneficial and as commonly known it would be at a job interview. People are very nervous when interviewing and it is because they want to show that they are the best candidate for the job that stress and anxiety kick in making the person nervous and jittery from time to time when interviewing. Then it seems like the person is not able to be attentive or is easily distracted when in reality they are just tense. There is also the time when someone meets another individual the first time. Again, they are just nervous and trying to find ways to get comfortable with this individual that it makes them seem uneasy and a bit quiet. Some body language is more obvious to discern and it is said that about 70% of our communication is achieved non-verbally and surprisingly more accurate than verbal communication. This was a very fun experiment to do in all honesty and I’ve come to learn even more of how vital both nonverbal and verbal communication are. There are many ways to get a message across and luckily we have the ability to use all of those ways.